YOU KNOW YOU'RE AUSTRALIAN IF: * You believe that stubbies can be either drunk or worn. * You're liable to burst out laughing whenever you hear of Americans "rooting" for something. * You believe the 'L' in the word 'Australia' is optional. * You can translate: 'Dazza and Shazza played Acca Dacca on the way to Maccas.' * You believe it makes perfect sense for a nation to decorate its highways with large fiberglass bananas, prawns and sheep. * You think 'Woolloomooloo' is a perfectly reasonable name for a place. * You're secretly proud of our killer wildlife. * You believe it makes sense for a country to have a $1 coin that's twice as big as its $2 coin. * You understand that 'Wagga Wagga' can be abbreviated to 'Wagga' but 'Woy Woy' can't be called 'Woy'. * You believe that cooked-down axle grease makes a good breakfast spread. You've also squeezed it through Vita Wheats to make little Vegemite worms. * Beetroot with your Hamburger... Of course. * You know that certain words must, by law, be shouted out during any rendition of the Angels' song 'Am I Ever Gonna See Your Face Again' And "Living next door to Alice". * You believe that the confectionery known as the Wagon Wheel has become smaller with every passing year. * You believe that the more you shorten someone's name the more you like them. * Whatever your linguistic skills, you find yourself able to order takeaway fluently in every Asian language. * You understand that 'excuse me' can sound rude, While 'scuse me' is always polite. * You know what it's like to swallow a fly, on occasion via your nose. * You know it's not summer until the steering wheel is too hot to handle and a seat belt buckle becomes a pretty good branding iron. * Your biggest family argument over the summer concerned the rules for beach cricket. * You shake your head in horror when companies try to market what they call 'Anzac cookies'. * You know how to abbreviate every word, all of which usually end in -o: arvo, combo, garbo, kero, metho, milko, muso, rego, servo, smoko, speedo, righto, goodo etc. * You know that there is a universal place called "woop woop" located in the middle of nowhere...no matter where you actually are. * You have, at some time in your life, slept with Aeroguard on in the summer. Maybe even as perfume. * You say 'no worries' quite often, whether you realise it or not. * You understand what no wucking furries means. * You've drank your tea/coffee/milo through a Tim Tam. * You own a Bond's chesty. In several different colours. * You know that some people pronounce Australia like "Straya" and that's ok. Have a ripper Australia Day everyone!
