Stupid questions some people ask.

[spilota_variegata]

I've got 2 dogs. I bought a large bag of Meaty Bites at Big W and was standing in line at the check-out.

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Meaty Bites Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 25 kgs before I woke in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Meaty Bites and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her.

Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned by the food.. I told her no, it was because I'd been sitting in the middle of the road licking myself (you know where) and a car hit me.

I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door.

Stupid cow...why else would I buy dog food??

 

[jessb]

Gold!!!

 

[kandi]

that is one fantastic story, i feel if i was listening to that one i would have been totally enthralled aswell waiting for the punchline. that is pretty typical of some people they state the obvious without thinking what they have just said. very very funny i could only wish i had such wit.

 

[spydalover]

lol

 

[Wild~Touch]

Hehehe, you naughty boy

 

[Freeloader]

Sensational!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[snake_lover]

haha thats awsum

 

[abbott75]

That was YOU?!?!!

 

[mysnakesau]

LMAO that is such a funny thing. So what about the lady? Did she see the funny side?

 

[waruikazi]

LMAO that is such a funny thing. So what about the lady? Did she see the funny side?

Or had she read it before in an email?

 

[mysnakesau]

LMAO x 2 for the most gullable person on the planet :lol: oh dear I am sooo slow

 

[wranga]

lol good on ya

 

[gecko-mad]

lol, that is gold!!!!

 

[bredli84]

The poor lady was probably trying to hit on you and was struggling for conversation.

 

[Vixen]

Stupid cow...why else would I buy dog food??

I buy dog food and dont have a dog. Its called rats. :lol:

 

[FAY]

I buy dog food and dont have a dog. Its called rats. :lol:

We buy dog food for our rats to supplement their rat and mouse pellets.

 

[Andie]

When I used to work at a jewellery shop, I asked a man if the earrings he was looking at were for a gift. Oops.

 

[ADZz_93]

whahahahahahahahahhaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

 

[BlindSnake]

I've got 2 dogs. I bought a large bag of Meaty Bites at Big W and was standing in line at the check-out.

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Meaty Bites Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 25 kgs before I woke in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Meaty Bites and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her.

Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned by the food.. I told her no, it was because I'd been sitting in the middle of the road licking myself (you know where) and a car hit me.

I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door.

Stupid cow...why else would I buy dog food??

*****Sound very similar to an E-mail I recieved 2 weeks ago.****
BUSTED takeing credit for someone elses joke...tut, tut, tut.

I Can't Shop at Walmart Anymore

Yesterday I was buying 2 large bags of Purina dog chow at Wal-Mart, for
my dogs Bubba and Annie. I was about to check out when a woman behind
me asked if I had a dog .

What did she think, that I had an elephant?

Since I had little else to do, on impulse, I told her that no, I didn't
have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet again, although I
probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital last time.

On the bright side though, I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an
intensive care ward with tubes coming out of every hole in my body and
IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and
that the way that it works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets
and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food
is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again. (I have to
mention here that practically everyone in the line was enthralled with
my story by now.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog
food had poisoned me. I told her no; I had stopped in the middle of the
parking lot to lick my butt and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he was
laughing so hard!

WAL-MART won't let me shop there anymore._________________________

 

[spilota_variegata]

Caught out I did make it more Aussie friendly though...