i used to think how could you?

[longqi]

Want to borrow a big old nasty reticulated python for her visit????

Ive worked with strangers and fear of snakes for years
Ones that throw hissy fits etc when they see someone calmly holding a snake 50metres away are just playing mind games
People with a genuine fear of snakes dont do that
They will back away
They will say 'dont come any closer'

We always involve kids when we meet people like that
They may be shaking in their boots but they nearly always watch from a safe distance
Snake fear and snake fascination are inextricably entwined

Ones that throw hissy fits and scream and yell are almost invariably rabidly religious or attention seekers

 

[borntobnude]

Want to borrow a big old nasty reticulated python for her visit????

Ive worked with strangers and fear of snakes for years
Ones that throw hissy fits etc when they see someone calmly holding a snake 50metres away are just playing mind games
People with a genuine fear of snakes dont do that
They will back away
They will say 'dont come any closer'

We always involve kids when we meet people like that
They may be shaking in their boots but they nearly always watch from a safe distance
Snake fear and snake fascination are inextricably entwined

Ones that throw hissy fits and scream and yell are almost invariably rabidly religious or attention seekers

As said in the related thread Get a Komodo ---Its only a Lizard !! pop a little one in post for her longqi :lol:

 

[Snake-Supplies]

*hugs*

 

[montysrainbow]

*hugs*

thanks josh

 

[Snake-Supplies]

I'd ask how you've been during my absence, but I wont...

 

[montysrainbow]

I had a thought I might get another young coastal and tell mother inlaw its a special pygmy breed lol im serious too by the way and every few yrs I could downsize BUT it would be hard to move them on because clearly I get attatched. I cant do the ant thing because I just dont like them! :/ jungles are not for me...not now anyway lol spoke to a breeder for half hr on the phone last night and she pretty much said none of theirs are friendly and she didnt recommend them.

 

[redbellybite]

Why are you allowing your mother inlaw to dictate what you have in your life ? ....if she chooses not to visit then its her loss and surely if you n your other half are happy to keep snakes as pets ,then it has nothing to do with her ...emotional blackmail is what she is using against you all ,and by going along with it your creating a bigger problem down the track ..what's to say her next whim is more personal then just a pet you own ...don't give in to her ,accomadate by maybe having the snake out of her sight ,whilst visiting ...but don't support her BS!

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Just to let you know too...my 'M,inlaw'is an over the top Catholic crazyarse woman ...who refused to come to our place because I had wizard and dragon statues and other mythical creatures in my loungeroom at the time,she said that my husband n I needed to get rid of all of this because its 'satanic' and she couldn't visit my 4 kids due to this. ...well we kept our mythical stuff ,and she missed seeing my kids for 6 years ! My kids didn't miss out ,they didn't care and it was her loss ..

 

[montysrainbow]

Why are you allowing your mother inlaw to dictate what you have in your life ? ....if she chooses not to visit then its her loss and surely if you n your other half are happy to keep snakes as pets ,then it has nothing to do with her ...emotional blackmail is what she is using against you all ,and by going along with it your creating a bigger problem down the track ..what's to say her next whim is more personal then just a pet you own ...don't give in to her ,accomadate by maybe having the snake out of her sight ,whilst visiting ...but don't support her BS!

- - - Updated - - -

Just to let you know too...my 'M,inlaw'is an over the top Catholic crazyarse woman ...who refused to come to our place because I had wizard and dragon statues and other mythical creatures in my loungeroom at the time,she said that my husband n I needed to get rid of all of this because its 'satanic' and she couldn't visit my 4 kids due to this. ...well we kept our mythical stuff ,and she missed seeing my kids for 6 years ! My kids didn't miss out ,they didn't care and it was her loss ..

Thanks for the advice I know u r right. I am mad at myself for allowing her to influence my desicion. I stuffed up but I think in the end I will get another and stick to my guns. I will have more time on my hands once my youngest gets a bit older all I do these days is bresstfeed and chase after the other 6 lol. My mother inlaw had this way of breaking me down...I hate it she has such a power trip over me.

 

[redbellybite]

Thanks for the advice I know u r right. I am mad at myself for allowing her to influence my desicion. I stuffed up but I think in the end I will get another and stick to my guns. I will have more time on my hands once my youngest gets a bit older all I do these days is bresstfeed and chase after the other 6 lol. My mother inlaw had this way of breaking me down...I hate it she has such a power trip over me.

Only you and your partner can stop it ...trust me on that one ,mine is now 70 years old ,she realises now that she missed out on my kids as adults they are now ,and even one of my girls has a son ,which makes the ole biddy a great grand ma ...she can't turn back time ,my kids still respect her because she is the grandma but in truth they aren't close to her either but that's her own doing and I can live with that ,knowing I didn't do anything wrong ,I just wouldnt change for her because I shouldn't have too...and you should be able being who you are too. Including keeping or doing what ever makes your family happy..

 

[wokka]

Its sad when you chose a life partner that you have to make a choice about their family. I am not sure that marriage requires that you roll over and adopt extended family "values". What will the next topic of blackmail be? Granny could easily have visited or invited her grand kids to neutral ground. Surround your children with good people and things so they have good mentors from which to establish their values. Sometimes the venom of a snake may produce better outcomes than a venemous grand mother!