What a waste of a day!!!! Some people are just rude!

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Tahlia, you obviously have way too much time on your hands....

I found most of them on the internet ages ago, they've always given me a good laugh. It was also entertaining reading about your mishap with that toy! I think stepping on a piece of leggo made me dance :D
 
Blue: I am literally pmsl right now at the computer, my kids are looking at me like I've lost the plot. Seriously, LMAO!!
I specified no noisy toys as well, but somehow they insinuated their way into our household. The Elmo was my nephew's, and long dead before I had kids. Or my sister had disposed of it and told my nephew it had died... it creeped her out as well. You've got to have a few if only to experience 'pass the irritating parcel' when other parents come to visit. Fair game; it's happened to us before, you go over to someone's house, your kid immediately picks up the bright junky toy that screeches monotonous drivel about friendship, dancing and (for some bizarre reason) pie in the marketplace, and suddenly you hear the deathknell from your now-ex-friends... "You can take that home with you if you like!"
Cue the car ride home with visions of plasticky slaughter, tossing it out the window 'accidentally', oh crap I've reversed over it... THREE TIMES (is it dead yet?). But then there's the conundrum... your child is glued to it. So you wait the week's waiting period for your kid to finally let go of the wretched thing and forget about it, shove it in a cupboard until the next hapless victim visits at your house and the cycle begins again.
Like stepping on lego, the dreaded number 3s, car-sickness and tantrums... it's a rite of passage you can one day look back on, laugh nervously about and change the subject. ;)
 
We have an evil remote control train. Goes off when it wants to and makes loud train noises for about 30 seconds at a time. It's found it's way to the bottle of the toy basket, much quieter down there

Bottom*
 
hahaha! i cant tell you the amount of toys i have tossed cause they drove me crazy, the worst was definitely a pink wand with flashing lights, that played the crazy frog song over and over again. it looked and sounded like it was meant to be in the hands of a raver that had too many E's, not in my 1yr old's hands. But as it was given to her by her only cousin (bought by his cow of a mother who subsequently got a nasty phone call) i had to be sly. It managed to fall out of the door of the car and under the wheels! the worst thing was it went into the bin still doing the crazy frog thing!!
 
Split from above post...

Noisy non-toys

I arrived back home one evening after a short drive to the shop and didn't bother to turn on the carport light. As I stepped inside in the dark, suddenly I felt something squishy underfoot. At the same moment it let out a loud squeal and growl. Apart from instantaneously doubling my blood pressure and making a certain sphincter muscle pucker at the same time, it caused me to raise my leg in a rapid and exaggerated motion. No sooner did I have my right leg air borne, than something clasped me around my left ankle and began pulling on it as if to bury it in the floor tiles. So down came one foot and up came the other, pretty much simultaneously. I reckon even Michael Jackson would have been impressed with nimbleness of that dance move.


By this stage my mind was racing faster than my pulse, running through the checklist of what the ferk could it be. With a couple of microseconds to spare before I went into panic mode, the light came on, the bell went off and the sensory information was matched up... Frog! A large sized Motorbike Frog had obviously parked itself near the carport door and jumped in once I open it. I had then inadvertently stepped on it. After a brief inspection and judging by its strength exerted in trying to get free, I reckoned it had suffered no real physical damage. It was a bit of a toss up though as to which one of us got the greater fright. So while my breathing rate and adrenalin levels slowly dropped to normal I returned it to it rightful place in the garden... a long ways away from the carport door.

Blue
 
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Yeah, me too. For the life of of me I cannot remember a Seuss story about "a man that uses a Hose".
 
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